Baking and Pastry – Day 5

Well, another Saturday has come and gone, and with it about 50 billion calories of delicious baked goods.  I wish I could say that Day 5 went off without a single problem.  Sadly, that wasn’t the case.

It all started so well.  We had a quiz, very easy.  We learned about shaping danishes and croissants.  Then it was time to get to work.  We started by making a Danish dough.  I followed the recipe exactly, and got the dough looking like the recipe said.  The recipe didn’t say that the dough was going to stick to absolutely everything in the kitchen.  It neglected to mention that we were supposed to add flour until the dough came together and was less sticky.  Yep, would have been very nice to know that before putting my hands in it and trying to shape it into a flat disc.  Oh well, that was the least of my problems.  Our croissant dough that we made last week needed 4 more turns.  Each turn needed a half hour rest in the fridge.  So that was going to take a long time to finish.

We also made sticky buns.  Now, I hate to say this, I really do.  Sometimes my lab partner annoys me.  It happens very infrequently, but it seems that she cares much more about combining strange flavors and making fillings than she does about the dough.  So while I am trying to do turns on both the danish dough and the croissant dough, she’s making half a dozen fillings, and occasionally making me watch them, which leads to problems.  For example, We were using the same cherries and creme de cassis that we used last week for our danishes.  Yes, the cherries were delicious.  She suggested we make a glaze, so we took the soaking liquid and added some brown sugar and set it on the stove to reduce.  Well, I was working on the dough, and the glaze started to smoke.  Nobody had a clue where the vent fans were, but we quickly found out.  Now since I was closer, I’m the one who looked like an idiot for not watching the glaze.  If instead of making the cream cheese filling, she would have either rolled the dough or watched the glaze, there would have been no problem.  But I guess it was at least partly my fault as well.

The fruits of our labor were a tray of maple and bacon sticky buns, a tray of cinnamon rolls with cream cheese icing, a tray of danishes (mostly vol au vents, with a few pinwheels) in raspberry cheese and cherry cheese, and 4 types of croissants, plain, chocolate, chocolate with raspberry, and chocolate with orange.  We drizzled some chocolate sauce on the chocolate raspberry and chocolate orange croissants, but I felt the drizzle had a bit too much of an alcohol taste from the Grand Marnier, which did not have a chance to burn off without the chocolate scorching.  Everything looked beautiful, and for the most part tasted excellent, but I was having a bad morning and was in a bad mood.  Nothing was going well.

I took pictures and will add them to the post as soon as I get a chance.

Next week, Cookies, I think.  The schedule is all screwed up, so I have no idea what we are actually going to do from week to week.  Stupid snow.

Culinary Arts Day 5

Now we’re cooking…

Day 5, Fruit and Vegetable Identification.  Yep,  It was like I had feared.  This is what an apple looks like.  But it wasn’t that bad.  We learned the classification of veggies and fruits (mostly obvious).  Then after a quick review of the recipes it was time to go into the kitchen.  We had a few minutes to prep our work stations.  Cutting boards, wash buckets, etc.  Then it was time for a discussion of mushrooms and truffles.  We got to taste white truffle oil and white truffle honey.  It has a distinct taste, not bad, just different.  We saw a whole bunch of different types of beans and dried fruits.  Then it was time to cook!

Our recipes for last night included a grilled eggplant salad, sauteed green beans, a vegetable stir fry, and braised red cabbage.  Now, I’m not a vegetable eater.  Never liked them.  Last night was one of my nightmares.  We have to try everything we make.  EVERYTHING!  I volunteered to make the red cabbage.  I sliced the cabbage into very thin shreds, used the julienne onions that were one of our homework assignments, some red wine, apple cider vinegar, and sugar.  Started by heating some clarified butter, added the cabbage and onion and cooked them for a few minutes, then added the sugar and wine.  After the liquid cooked out, I added the vinegar and set the pan on the back burner to sit while everything else was cooking.  I helped the others in my group prep for their dishes.  I finely chopped some mint for the eggplant salad, I put plates in the oven to warm,  sliced some mushrooms for the stir fry, washed dishes,  etc.

After everything was done cooking, we plated our dishes, garnished and waited for critique.  Our cabbage was the best tasting.  Our stir fry was also the best, due in part to the use of some ginger-garlic oil.  Our eggplant salad was presented well, and tasted OK, and our green beans were a bit overcooked.  All in all a successful evening of cooking.  I did actually eat everything on my plate.  I was shocked.  I still don’t like green beans.

After cleanup, Chef did a demonstration on spaghetti squash, which was delicious, and how to cut supremes of oranges.  Part of next weeks homework along with some celery matchsticks and dice.

Next week.  Poultry.  We have to debone two chickens.  We’re then frying breaded chicken tenders, making hot wings, grilling chicken, simmering chicken for chicken salad, and a couple of other applications.  Lots of food next week.   And no veggies!!!

Baking and Pastry Day 4

Thankfully, getting into the building this week was a lot easier.  Chef was there before me, as were a few others.  Admittedly, I wasted some time in the car listening to music because I didn’t want to wait out in the cold.

This week’s lesson was about laminated doughs, like danish dough, puff pastry and croissant dough.  We learned about the method of making a laminated dough.  Wrap a giant hunk of butter with dough, chill, roll, fold, roll, fold, roll, etc.  The more folds, the more layers, the lighter and flakier the finished product.  Chef decided that from now on, we’ll do our quizzes in class rather than online, because the online quizzes weren’t working for anyone.  Too bad, because I got a 96% on my first quiz.  Chef also told us what we were making.  Challah from the preferment from last week, croissant dough, and our choice of more baguettes, even more focaccia, or sticky buns.  It was pretty obvious that everyone wanted to make sticky buns, but my lab partner and I decided that wasn’t enough so we did sticky buns and baguettes.  I wanted more baguette practice, and I wanted to use my new stippling knife I bought at Sur Le Table for $6.  Plus, we’re overachievers.  So we started with the challah which had to rise, and then the baguettes, which also had to rise, then the sticky bun dough.  We contemplated our sticky buns, and decided to make two types.  I was in charge of the chocolate/hazelnut/caramel sticky buns.  My partner, Gen, was in charge of the cherry hazelnut nutmeg sticky buns.  We started constructing our fillings.  I toasted some hazelnuts, rubbed the skins off, and tossed them into the food processor to grind them up finely.  Gen took some dried cherries, and rehydrated them with some water and a generous splash of Creme de Cassis, a currant flavored liqueur.  I also decided to make a caramel sauce to top the buns.  I took sugar, corn syrup, and water and dissolved the sugar in one pan.  In another I barely heated some heavy cream with a splash of Frangelico, a hazelnut liqueur that is a favorite of mine.  The caramel came out perfectly, and I added another generous splash of Frangelico while whisking in the cream.  I added a small amount of butter for richness.  After letting it cool, I tasted the caramel and it was amazing.  Rich, sweet, nutty.  Chef tried it and I got a “Me Likey!”  I’m going to assume that was good.  We shaped our challah, we shaped our baguettes, and we shaped our sticky buns.  We started to run out of time, so we quickly threw together the croissant dough, and I did the rolling while Gen did some dishes and pulled our challah and baguettes out of the oven.  We were way past the end of class when our sticky buns came out of the oven, but they were worth the wait.  I even have pictures this time!

Next week, Croissants, more sticky buns, and danish dough.

Culinary Arts Day 4

I’m actually posting the day after class.   I’m shocked too.

So last night was a lesson on heat transfer and cooking methods.  The lecture started in a way I hadn’t expected, Pop Quiz!  The quiz was on identifying kitchen equipment and their uses.  Of the 10 items, 3 were knives, Paring Knife, Serrated Bread Knife, and Boning Knife.  Fairly easy.  There was a sauce pan, a sauteuse, a chinois, a bench scraper, a perforated spoon, a shallow full hotel pan,  and one other item I cannot recall right now.  It was an easy quiz.

We then had a lecture about the methods of heat transfer, the effects of heat on food, and the various cooking methods.  Pretty standard lecture.  Then it was time to hit the kitchen.  We started with a demonstration of how to make caramel sauce.  Then after setting up our work stations, we portioned out 2 4oz. hamburgers and 2 3oz chicken breasts.  We were to grill one hamburger to medium rare and one to well done.  While we were doing that we were to poach one chicken breast and boil the other.  I must say, having a digital instant read thermometer was a life saver.  I’m seriously considering buying a second for those times that I have two items cooking that I need to measure temperature of.  I also plan on buying a oil/candy thermometer for monitoring the temperature of water when poaching.  If it gets too high it turns into a simmer, and if it gets too low (under 165) you’ll never get your chicken fully cooked.

My grill marks on the burgers were beautiful.  Nice little square cross hatching.  Absolutely perfect.  The medium rare burger was perfect.  Juicy, flavorful, even with no seasoning.  The well done burger was just kind of overcooked for my taste.  My wife would have loved it, but I like my meat more on the rare side.  That brings up an interesting discussion we had.  There is an idea floating around called the McDonalds Principle.  Basically, in this day and age, a lot of people like their steaks medium rare, but their burgers medium well or well done.  This is because they are used to getting burgers from fast food restaurants where they are completely overcooked and dry.  People are conditioned to enjoy those dry overcooked burgers, even when medium rare burgers are clearly superior.

The boiled chicken was bland, dry, and rubbery.  The poached was moist, tender and had some flavor.  It would have had better flavor if it were poached in a more flavorful liquid than water.

I want to add one thing.  The girls in my class have dirty minds, while the guys are polite.  Not one guy made any jokes about the meat.  My two female lab partners made a “I’m beating my meat” joke and a “Want me to grab your meat” joke. I also heard a “playing with my meat” joke and a “I grabbed your breasts” joke from girls at another station.   And we guys get a bad reputation.

After we were done with the meat, we made our own caramel sauce.  We got to use judgment about when the caramel had reached a deep amber color.  We chose well, our caramel was delicious.

Then after yet another review of how many cups were in a pint, we learned the most horrible knife cut of all.  The Tournee!!!  For those who don’t know, it is a seven sided, football shaped  piece of potato or other vegetable.  I personally have never seen a tournee on any plate of food I have ever received.  I doubt I ever will.

While no chef will confirm this, I believe I have determined the origins of the tournee.  A long time ago in France, of course, there was a chef.  Now this chef was probably the personal chef of the Marquis de Sade, because this chef was a sadistic bastard.  He was an accomplished chef so he was sought by many apprentices to teach them his skills.  So he took on a handful of apprentices, who he loved to torture by playing cruel tricks on them such as “fetch me a bucket of steam” or “hand me the bacon stretcher”.  One day, his sadistic cruelty had come to its ultimate level.  I will get these apprentices to cut a shape that should never exist in nature.  It will be shaped like an egg, but with flat ends, and I want it to have exactly 7 perfectly even sides.  He chose 7 of course because he knew that a circle had 360 degrees and the only number under 10 that 360 isn’t evenly divisible by is 7.  Yep, this chef was a prick.  So, he gave his apprentices each a sack of root vegetables.  Not even potatoes, something firmer like turnips (ooh, that douchebag).  He described this heinously evil shape, and told them he wanted them each to spend the day cutting them because it was a very important standard cut that every chef should learn.  This chef giggled with delight each time an apprentice sliced open his thumb with his paring knives.  But at the end of the day, each apprentice had succeeded in making exactly one perfect tournee.  Only one from a giant sack of turnips, because it is almost physically impossible to cut that shape.  The chef was shocked that they were able to not only cut that oh so evil shape, but that they were still alive after the massive blood loss  from their thumbs.  So, he set them about this task again and again, until their thumbs had developed callouses and were as tough as thick leather and they could tournee a vegetable in under a minute.  The chef was amazed at their determination and thought them worthy of his time.  Those apprentices all became chefs, who did the same thing to their apprentices, and so on and so on.  Now every culinary student has to practice cutting an absolutely useless shape.  The End.

Its the only possible explanation that I can think of.  Mine turned out misshapen, but a good first attempt.

Culinary school is the only place where you can spend an hour working on something, show your professor, have him say it looks good, then immediately throw it in the trash.

Next week, fruit and vegetable identification.  Seriously.  This is an apple.  This is a banana.  This is celery. …  This is a persimmon.  This is a quince.  This is a rutabaga.  … This is zucchini.  (Oh yeah, I can name a fruit or vegetable starting with every letter but X.  I’m awesome.)

Baking and Pastry Day 3

OK, this is a bit overdue, since my class is on Saturday, but I’ve been busy, and lazy.

First of all, a big welcome to Ashley and anyone else from Cheftalk who read my post and decided to read my blog.  I’ll try to keep it as entertaining as possible.  Baking and Pastry day 3 was amazing, but started a bit rough.

My class starts at 8:30 , and me being the overeager student, I left the comfort of my wife’s Xterra at about 8:00.  I figured I could use the extra time to figure out how to actually get to the building.  The 5 feet of snow we had gotten was plowed up onto the sidewalk into an impenetrable wall of ice.  I took a very roundabout way of getting out of the garage and wound up taking the long way, since the wall of ice extended all the way up the street.  I finally made it to the front of the building, and realize that I had forgotten to bring an ingredient that my lab partner and I were planning to use.  I figured that when we had a slow moment (dough takes time to rise), I could walk to the grocery store a few doors down and grab what I needed.  So I stood outside in the cold, since our chef hadn’t arrived yet.  He pulls up in his new car, gets out, goes to the passenger side, digs around a bit and yells, “Son of a b—-!”  He yells over to me, “Go someplace warm, I have to go and get the keys.”  I now have plenty of time to go to the store, so I walk in, carrying my book bag on one shoulder and my knife kit on my other, wearing my full chef uniform.  I love attracting attention.  Truthfully, I wear my whites with pride, and it brings a smile to people’s faces when they see a chef walking around.  I find the one item I need, Emerald Cocoa Roast Almonds (yummy), and head to the checkout after killing a few minutes looking for any variety of diet vanilla cola with no luck whatsoever.  I swear there is a conspiracy to keep me from enjoying Vanilla Coke Zero, or Diet Vanilla Pepsi.  Anyway, I walk back and see the rest of my classmates huddled in the cold.  I explain what happened, and we all wait together.  For a half hour.  There was traffic on his way home due to the snow, and the accident he witnessed where a pickup truck hit a snowbank and flipped onto its roof so hard that it crushed the roof down to meet the truck bed.  Somehow, I don’t think the driver walked away from that.  Especially after the car behind the truck smashed into the back of it.  Isn’t winter great?  But chef returned and we got inside into the warmth.

Lecture passed very quickly because he wanted us to have plenty of lab time.  Since the snow had completely destroyed our schedules, he had to figure out what we would make.  We were going to make another focaccia, with living yeast this time.  We didn’t have the preferments necessary for the breads we were going to bake, so we would put that off until the following week, and make the preferment for challah.  He decided on yeast dinner rolls, and baguettes, since neither required a preferment.  Not that the baguette couldn’t have used a preferment, it just wasn’t required.

We started on the baguettes and focaccia first because they took the longest to rise.  Our baguettes were the first thing we actually stuck to the recipe with.  My lab partner and I like to experiment with flavors and combinations, so we make strange things, like our fig and gorgonzola focaccia.  So this weeks focaccia was going to be a cinnamon-chili pepper focaccia with grated chocolate on top.  While I gathered ingredients for the dough for both the focaccia and baguettes, my lab partner infused some peanut oil with red pepper flakes.  She brushed that on a piece of parchment paper and sprinkled on some semolina.  She added the cinnamon to the dough and we set our focaccia and baguette doughs aside to rise.  We then decided to make honey wheat dinner rolls and a honey butter to go with them.  We set that dough to rise, then made our preferment for the challah.  By that time our focaccia and baguette dough had risen, so we prepared the focaccia for a second rise, and portioned our baguette dough for a rest.  We then watched the chef demo how to shape a baguette, and did the same with our rested dough.   Baguette forming is a little tricky and will require practice.  So we let our shaped baguettes rise a second time, and turn our attention to our rolls, which had risen.  We portioned the dough into rolls,and shaped them into balls and set them to rise a second time.  Then it was back to the focaccia.  We drizzled on a little grapeseed oil and sprinkled on a generous portion of turbinado sugar.  We popped it in the oven and waited.  We then put the baguettes in the oven.  Unfortunately, someone had moved the chef’s spray bottle so we couldn’t steam the oven.  Steam helps promote crust development.  Then we put an egg wash on our rolls and put them in the oven.  I burned my finger pulling the baguettes out of the oven because the rag I was using had a thin spot.

Our focaccia came our beautiful.  The sugar caramelized on the top and became nice and crunchy.  The grated chocolate melted on top and balanced the heat and sweetness very nicely.  The baguettes developed a great crust, even without the steam.  The rolls came out shiny and beautiful.  Everything tasted great.  But there was way too much, so everyone wound up taking a bunch of stuff home.

As I was walking back to the car, an old man in a pickup truck rolled down his window and yelled, “Hey Chef Boyardee!”  I laughed, and would have waved if I wasn’t carrying two baguettes, a dozen rolls and a half sheet of focaccia.  Like I said, people like to see a chef.

A good day in class.

Culinary Arts Day 3

It’s been almost two weeks since my last post, and this one is really long overdue.  But I’ve been lazy and busy at the same time.

So, day 3, which was actually over a week ago.  All about taste.  The lecture included a discussion about taste buds.  Yep, the same stuff you learn in 3rd grade science class.  Then a lesson about the various flavors found in kitchen staples.  Spices, herbs, oils, vinegars, etc.  The lecture went pretty fast then it was off to the kitchen.  We later found out why the lecture went fast, they were using our classroom for a cheese tasting class.  So we learn about taste, but don’t get to taste yummy cheeses?  But we did taste a bunch of other stuff.  It started with a wonderful experience of the 5 tastes.  Honey from the school’s hives for sweet.  Tamarind for sour.  Soy sauce for salty.  Baker’s chocolate for bitter.  And a mushroom demiglace for umami.  I’ve never really tried mushrooms before, and have to admit, if it was cooked like that, I’d eat them.  After that, a run through of the various herbs in the kitchen, spices, spice blends, oils, vinegars, and finally a tasting session.  The chefs put out cups of all of the spices, oils, vinegars, and spice blends in the kitchen.  We were invited to sniff, taste, and experience each one.   Also laid out for us was a selection of salts.  About 15 different salts from around the world.  Each had a distinct taste.   My favorite was Kala Namak, which tasted exactly like hard boiled eggs.  It was such a strange experience.  After the cups were put away, the chefs made some pasta for us.  Two separate pans.  One using all dried herbs and spices.  The other using fresh.  There was a very distinct difference.  The fresh herbs made the pasta feel more alive.  The look of the pasta with freshly chiffonaded basil was much nicer as well.  There was nothing wrong with the dried herb pasta, it was delicious.  It just wasn’t as vibrant as the fresh herbs.

After the taste demonstrations it was time for more knife skills.  We learned how to chiffonade and practiced on romaine lettuce leaves.  We also learned how to concasse (peel, seed, and chop) a tomato.  While practicing, I almost cut my thumb on my paring knife.  I was lucky, no damage.  We also practices disassembling a potato, some celery, some carrots, some garlic, and a shallot.  Success all around.

Clean up, and time to go.

Since then, we have gotten over 5 feet of snow, and school has been closed for over a week.  Hopefully, tomorrow will be my next Baking class.

Baking and Pastry Day 2

I had my second Baking and Pastry class on Saturday, and it was a success.  Here’s the story.

The weatherman was calling for a snow storm the entire week before class.  Over the week, the forecast was changed to a light snowfall with heavier snow to the south.  All of the snow was supposed to start at noon on Saturday, so my class which ends at 1:45 would be over before there was too much on the ground.  In anticipation of my class being canceled, I woke up at 4:30 and checked my phone.  No message.  Whew,  I look forward to my classes.  I lie in bed.  Once my brain is awake, I can’t get back to sleep.   I get out of bed, head to the basement, and watch some TV.  I come up an hour later, shower, and get ready for class.  I put on my uniform, and head out into the cold.  It was about 18 degrees, according to the news before I left the house.  Now, there really is no reason for it to ever be that cold anywhere.   After making the drive (and stopping for a bite to eat on the way) I park in the garage, and eat my breakfast.

When its 18 degrees outside, and you’re in a warm happy car, you really don’t want to leave.  You also don’t remember what 18 degrees feels like, so when you open the car door, it hits you like a ton of bricks.  Especially if you’re only wearing a T-shirt, because wearing your chef coat in the car would make it all wrinkled.  I donned my chef coat, and walked across the street to the building and pulled the door handle to enter the building, and it was locked.  Dammit!  I stood outside the school with two others and waited for someone to arrive and open the doors.  About 5 minutes later we were all in the warm building.  Well, the building wasn’t entirely warm.  The kitchens have super sized vent fans, which pull in cold air, so the kitchen was cold.  Not freezing, but cold.

At 8:30, class began, and our lecture was about pie and pastry dough.  Very interesting lecture, followed by our first real work in the kitchen.  We were paired up and tasked with creating two pie doughs.  A mealy pie dough and a flaky pie dough.  But first, we were allowed to make the dough for our focaccia.  We were told last week that we were going to make focaccia and we could top them however we wanted.  I came up with an idea, which my lab partner quickly agreed with, for a fig and gorgonzola focaccia with prosciutto.  We followed the recipe, which was very easy, and set our dough to rise.  Meanwhile, we got started on our pie doughs.  We made dough to be frozen and then thawed much later in the semester.  This was a combination of practice of making pie dough, and an experiment by our chef to prove that the pie dough should be made the week before we were going to use it, and refrigerated.  We made both of our pie doughs and while my lab partner was doing a little clean up and macerating the figs, I walked to the grocery store and picked up the gorgonzola.  I had purchased the prosciutto the previous evening and already stored it in the temporary fridge.  In the two and a half hours that we had been inside, there was already a nice blanket of snow on the ground.  About 3/4 of an inch at the time.  I trudged through the snow, in my chef uniform, to the grocery store and purchased the gorgonzola.  When I got back, I saw all of our dishes in a neat little pile, waiting to be washed.  Dammit!  So, I took them to the sink and realized something.  You never see anyone in a chef’s coat washing dishes.  Do you know why?  Because when you’re reaching for the mixer attachment that you dropped to the bottom of the deep sink, your sleeves soak up a lot of water.  I was now drenched.  Grrrr….  But I got over it, finished washing the dishes, and returned to our now risen dough.  Well, mostly risen, or at least partially risen.  It seems that our yeast was on its last legs, and nobody got a very good rise out of their dough.  We put our dough on our prepared 1/2 sheet pan, added the toppings, drizzled on some grapeseed oil, and put it in the proofing box to help it rise.  Again, nobody got a good rise.  We baked our bread and it turned out beautifully.  We were very proud of our creation.  Our chef told us while we were making our dough, that the dough was a living thing (because of the yeast), and we should name it.  We named ours Newton, because we were using figs.  We quickly cut into Newton and tasted the spoils of our hard work.  He was delicious.  Crispy top and bottom, soft tender inside.  Sweet figs, salty cheese and ham.  He was a good bread.

A few minutes later, we were dismissed and walked out into what must have been at least 3 inches of snow.  Yep, the weatherman was wrong.  Grrrr…  The roads home were treacherous.  My car was sliding, as were most of the other cars on the road.  I got home safely, and stayed inside where I finally got warm.

Next week, yeast dinner rolls, pre-ferments for the following week’s breads, and a second focaccia, this time with live yeast.  We’re keeping the same partners for a few weeks, and we’ve decided on another non-traditional focaccia, this time with Chocolate, Cinnamon, and Cayenne Pepper.  Should be fun.  If the next winter storm doesn’t cancel class.  Stupid weather.

Culinary Arts Day 2

While I am taking more classes than just Culinary Arts and Baking and Pastry, I’m going to spare everyone the details of my lecture only/online classes.  Introduction to Hospitality is interesting to learn about, but not as interesting to talk about, although if anything interesting happens, I will post about it.  And my Certification in Sanitation class would just turn everyone off of eating at a restaurant ever again.  Something about leaning about all the possible bacteria, parasites, toxins, fungi, and viruses (only 2 transmissable through food, Hepatitis A and Norovirus) just kinda made me a little paranoid.

So, last night was my Culinary Arts class.  I have to say that I’m really enjoying my classes.  I have made some friends.  Some other career changers like myself, and a few young’uns just out of high school.  Last night’s lecture was concerning Kitchen Equipment, Knives, Knife Cuts, and Measurements.  We got a very good introduction to the different heavy equipment in the kitchen, including how to light the pilot lights on everything.  Very important to know if you don’t want to blow up your kitchen.

We learned the basics about our knives, what each is used for, how to sharpen them, and how to hone them.  Much of this I already knew.  I have sharpened tools before, including putting a razor sharp edge on some chisels and a butterfly knife I use at home for various things like opening boxes.  And I have honed kitchen knifes before using a steel.  I must say, if you don’t own a steel, buy one and use it.  It keeps your knifes ‘sharp’ between sharpenings.  It doesn’t actually sharpen the knives, it just straightens the cutting edge.  And if you have a decent set of knives that you use often, either sharpen them using a whetstone/oilstone or better yet, have them professionally reground around once a year.  Its not too expensive and sharp knives are not only safer, but will save you tons of aggrivation from trying to find a knife sharp enough to use.

We then learned the different knife cuts that we were going to practice that evening.  Simple at first.  Matchsticks and dice.  Our work in the kitchen last night was to dice 1/2 an onion and cut a carrot into batonnets and a small dice.  A batonnet is a matchstick cut 1/4″ x 1/4″ x 2-2 1/2″.  From there, we can cut the small dice, which is a 1/4″ cube.  I successfully diced my onion without crying, and cut my carrots fairly well.  My problem is that I don’t really have a good idea what 1/4″ actually looks like.  My cuts were a bit smaller than they should have been.  I have good technique, but need to practice judging size.  I figure a few hours of disassembling carrots and onions this weekend should be sufficient to become a better judge of size.

We learned the basics of measurements, volumetrically that is.  Cups and pints and teaspoons and tablespoons, etc.  How to convert from one to the other.  For example, if you have a recipe that calls for 1 teaspoon of an ingredient, but are making it on a much larger scale, say 15 x the recipe, you don’t want to measure out 15 teaspoons, that’s time consuming.  Instead, convert the 15 teaspoons into 5 tablespoons, or better yet 1/4 cup + 1 tablespoon.

At the end of the class, after cleanup, we had a kitchen scavenger hunt.  The chef gave us each a card or two with the name of a piece of kitchen equipment on it, and had us locate and bring it back.  My cards, gotten randomly, were tongs and a sauce pan.  How much easier could that have been?  I’d have much preferred something more of a challenge, like a chinois, sautoir, or piano whisk.

Now for my one complaint.  I took a whole bunch of years of French in grade school through high school, and even a semester of French 101 in college for an easy A.  All of that gave me excellent pronunciation skills.  My chef, however, does not have those skills.  He is butchering the french language.  For example, he referred to a brunoise as a broon-wah, instead of a broon-wahz.  The e on the end makes you pronounce the s.  Also, he pronounce bain marie as bane marie instead of ban marie, or the more correct baa marie. (Not bah, like a sheep, but like ban without the n.)  Its just a pet peeve of mine.  I’ll get used to it, and undoubtedly I will refer to items with the correct pronunciation, and hopefully he will take notice and attempt to learn to pronounce the equipment properly.

All in all, I love my classes.  Next week, in addition to more knife practice, we will be learning about taste.  We will be sampling a variety of different salts to learn to appreciate the subtle differences.  We will also be having some pasta with different herbs, one set of pasta using dried herbs, and one using fresh herbs to show the differences between the two.  I’m not 100% sure, but we may also be making caramel, which will be very interesting.  I’ve always wanted to try making caramel, but never actually did it.

KFC WTF?

I didn’t bring anything with me for lunch today.  Mostly on purpose.  And this morning I realized that I have a horrible cold, and I’m completely stuffed up.  So, I decide upon the easy method of clearing out my sinuses.  I’ll eat something really spicy.  I decide on the hottest thing within a few minute drive from work, KFC’s new Fire Grilled Wings.  They’re called Fire Grilled because they are really hot, not because they are grilled over a flame.  The closest flame these wings ever saw was the incredibly gay guy who took my order.  The wings worked and I can actually breathe now, but I was met with horrible news.

I also got some potato wedges and chicken strips because I knew 5 wings wouldn’t satisfy me.  I asked for some Sweet and Sour sauce to dip my strips in, and found out that KFC is no longer offering Sweet and Sour Sauce.  Seriously?  Now, I’ve had issues with KFC before, specifically about Sweet and Sour Sauce.  A few years ago, KFC had the best Sweet and Sour Sauce.  It was in a little tub with an orange peel off lid.  It was spicy, and delicious.  It was the king of Sweet and Sour Sauces.  I could have drank that Sweet and Sour Sauce.  But like anything I like, it goes away forever.  They changed the recipe from a golden brownish opaque sauce with lots of spicy flecks to a pink clear goo with little bits of green and red peppers in it.  The same generic Sweet and Sour Sauce that Burger King has.  Crappy lame useless sugary sauce.  And now, even that is gone.  No more Sweet and Sour Sauce.

What kind of evil corporate cost cutting measures are they doing to deprive their customers of first good Sweet and Sour Sauce, and then barely passable Sweet and Sour Sauce?  I miss KFC’s old Sweet and Sour Sauce.  I grew up dipping my chicken into that nectar of the gods.  I never let a drop go to waste.  I would lick every drop from that little plastic tub.  Now I’ll never taste that deliciousness ever again.

So, what am I to do?  I could try making my own, but wouldn’t have any idea where to even start.  KFC won’t give up their secrets.  I’m completely out of luck.  Damn you KFC.  How could you make the dipping sauce equivalent of heroin and then yank it away from me.

Baking and Pastry Day 1

I probably should have titled my last post Culinary Arts Day 1, but I’m too lazy to go back and change it.  In actuality, I’m taking four classes this semester.  Why?  Because I’m an idiot and thought I could easily jump back into the college thing taking one class less than I took last time I was in college.  Little did my brain realize that I now have a full time job and a wife to occupy my time.  Next semester I think I’ll limit myself to three classes.  Luckily one of my classes only runs for 4 weeks (my Certificate in Sanitation class)  I guess it takes that long to explain how to wash your hands, keep your workspace clean, keep food out of the temperature danger zone, and prevent cross contamination.  I’m sure its a little more involved than that, but probably not too much.  The scary thing is, the people who cook at fast food and some casual dining restaurants didn’t have to take that class to get their job.

Anyway, back to the topic at hand.  After the first lesson, I realized that I’m really going to like my baking and pastry class.  My instructor is really cool and laid back.  He is a self-professed lazy chef.  He knows a ton of shortcuts and is going to teach us a whole lot of them.  There are certain things we are expected to know for the exam, including weighing using the balance scale, but during the class when we’re actually cooking, we can take shortcuts, like using digital scales.  He is changing the order of the lessons because he didn’t agree with how they were laid out.  Rather than make pie crust on the second week and freeze it for use weeks later, we are waiting until the week before we use the pie crust to make it, and refrigerate it.  That way there will be no ice crystal formation in the butter, which would lead to a less flaky crust.  We are also not only allowed, but encouraged, to put our own personal spin on the recipes we use in class.  In a real commercial kitchen, we won’t be allowed to experiment and make mistakes, but in the college kitchen, we can experiment as much as we want, and we will be the only ones to see our mistakes.  For example, next week we are making focaccia.  He will be providing basic recipes for us to follow, but we can bring in ideas for our own variations.  I have decided on a fig and gorgonzola focaccia with prosciutto.  I saw the recipe on Epicurious and decided to give it a try.  The original recipe didn’t call for prosciutto, but one of the comments suggested that the saltiness might help balance the sweetness of the figs.  So, I have decided to try it.  In addition, I am considering adding red pepper flakes to bring a little heat to the party as well.

There are lots of great flavor combinations that work well together.  Sweet and Salty go great together (its hard to resist a chocolate covered pretzel).  Sweet and Hot work very well together too.  There is a reason that Jalapeno jelly exists.  One thing that I have seen pictures of and really would love to try are red chili peppers dipped in chocolate.  They look so beautiful, so inviting, but you know that they’re vicious and can’t wait to burn your mouth.  I’m sure it is an exquisite mixture of pleasure and pain.  Like S&M for your mouth.  Wait, that’s probably not a great way to put it.  But, it fits. I just had a great idea.  A candy coated chocolate candy with a bit of super hot pepper inside.  I’ll call them S&Ms, like M&Ms but with a kick.  This blog is protected by a copyright, so don’t even try to steal my intellectual property.  Bastards!

So that was basically how my first Baking and Pastry class went.  I’ll let you know how the focaccia turns out next week.